Monday, 31 January 2011

Interseting Science

I was reading something from the site Octaboona told us about and found some really funny quotes from kids, usually in the 5th or 6th grade. Enjoy. :]


"Clouds just keep circling the earth around and around. And around. There is not much else to do."


"Cyanide is so poisonous that one drop of it on a dog's tongue will kill the strongest man."


"For dog bite: put the dog away for several days. If he has not recovered, then kill it."


"Germinate: To become a naturalized German."


"I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing."  


"In some rocks you can find the fossil footprints of fishes."


 "Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound."


"It is so hot in some places that the people there have to live in other places."


"Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil."


"Most books now say our sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into a sun in the daytime."


"Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."


"Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."


"Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun. But I have never been able to make out the numbers."


"South America has cold summers and hot winters, but somehow they still manage."


"Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners."


"The earth makes a resolution every 24 hours."


"The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes."


"The parts of speech are lungs and air."


"The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects."


"The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon.  All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."


"There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the Earth because of so much population stomping around up here these days."


"Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars."


"Vacuums are nothings.  We only mention them to let them know we know they're there."


"Water vapor gets together in a cloud. When it is big enough to be called a drop, it does."


"We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on."


"When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide."


"Wind is like the air, only pushier."

Sunday, 30 January 2011

The Importance of Grammar

We need grammar. It is very important for communication. Otherwise you end up with conversations like this one. :D



The importance of good grammar...


I had only just arrived at the club when I bumped into Roger. After we had exchanged a few pleasantries, he lowered his voice and asked, "What do you think of Martha and I as a potential twosome?"
"That," I replied, "would be a mistake. Martha and me is more like it."
"You're interested in Martha?"
"I'm interested in clear communication."
"Fair enough," he agreed. "May the best man win." Then he sighed. "Here I thought we had a clear path to becoming a very unique couple."
"You couldn't be a very unique couple, Roger."
"Oh? And why is that?"
"Martha couldn't be a little pregnant, could she?"
"Say what? You think that Martha and me...."
"Martha and I."
"Oh." Roger blushed and set down his drink. "Gee, I didn't know."
"Of course you didn't," I assured him. "Most people don't."
"I feel very badly about this."
"You shouldn't say that: I feel bad...."
"Please, don't," Roger said. "If anyone's at fault here, it's me!"

The Computerized Version of The Creation of Life




This always makes me laugh.




The Computerized Version of The Creation of Life




In the beginning there was the computer. And God said Let there be light!
Enter user id.

God
Enter password.

Omniscient
Password incorrect. Try again.

Omnipotent
Password incorrect. Try again.

Technocrat
And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

Let there be light!
Unrecognizable command. Try again.

Create light
Done

Run heaven and earth
And God created Day and Night. And God saw there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday, March 1. Approx. funds remaining: $92.50.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Monday, March 2.
Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light
Unrecognizable command. Try again.

Create firmament
Done.

Run firmament
And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors. And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Monday, March 2. Approx. funds remaining: $84.60.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.

Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place and let the dry land appear and....
Too many characters in specification string. Try again.

Create dry_land
Done.

Run firmament
And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors. And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3. Approx. funds remaining: $65.00.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.

Create lights in the firmament to divide the day from the night
Unspecified type. Try again.

Create sun_moon_stars
Done

Run sun_moon_stars
And God created the heavens. And God saw there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4. Approx. funds remaining: $54.00.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.

Create fish
Done

Create fowl
Done

Run fish, fowl
And God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that creepeth wherewith the waters swarmed after its kind and every winged fowl after its kind. And God saw there were 0 errors.
And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.
Approx. funds remaining: $45.00.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Friday, March 6.

Create cattle
Done

Create creepy_things
Done

Now let us make man in our image
Unspecified type. Try again.

Create man
Done

Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth.
Too many command operands. Try again.

Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 6 errors.

Insert breath
Done

Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 5 errors.

Move man to Garden of Eden
File Garden of Eden does not exist.

Create Garden.edn
Done

Move man to Garden.edn
Done

Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 4 errors.

Copy woman from man
Done

Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 3 errors.

Insert woman into man
Illegal parameters. Try again.

Insert man into woman
Done

Run multiplication
Execution terminated. 2 errors.

Create desire
Done

Run multiplication
And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

Create freewill
Done

Run freewill
And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

Undo desire
Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.

Destroy freewill
Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.

Help
Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.
Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.

Create tree_of_knowledge
And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

Create good, evil
Done

Activate evil
And God saw he had created shame.
Warning system error in sector E95. Man and woman not in Garden.edn.
1 errors.

Scan Garden.edn for man, woman
Search failed.

Delete shame
Shame cannot be deleted once evil has been activated.

Destroy freewill
Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.

Stop
Unrecognizable command. Try again
Break Break Break
ATTENTION ALL USERS *** ATTENTION ALL USERS: COMPUTER GOING DOWN FOR REGULAR DAY OF MAINTENANCE AND REST IN FIVE MINUTES.
PLEASE LOG OFF.

Create new world
You have exceeded your allocated file space. You must destroy old files before new ones can be created.

Destroy earth
Destroy earth: Please confirm.

Destroy earth confirmed
COMPUTER DOWN *** COMPUTER DOWN. SERVICES WILL RESUME SUNDAY, MARCH 8 AT 6:00 AM. YOU MUST SIGN OFF NOW.

And God logged off at 11:59:59 PM, Friday, March 6.
Approx. funds remaining: $0.00.

Friday, 28 January 2011

Three Paragraphs of Confusion

You see, I found a few copies of this paper my brother had written to a friend a long time ago. In this paper of three paragraphs, he's completely flaunting his vocabulary lol. I thought I would let y'all share in my complete bewilderment. :]
This is going to be fun! :P

P.S. I changed the names because... technically, I don't have permission to put this on here. :]


Dear Molly,

      During the nocturnal segment of the diurnal period preceding the night in which Cici's become a bedlam set apart for prepubescent wights, Jeremy, our glabrous comrade, espied the message in which you bestowed upon him a thorough tongue-lashing. Your supposition, that he composed the fallacious~and might I add, droll~application, was highly erroneous.
      I, jocular as I am, was weary of the interminably banal happenings. Since the cubicle in which I lave the tableware was in a fine fettle, I capitulated to my more puckish side. I surreptitiously procured a blank application. Taking it from it's erstwhile position, I filled it with a surfeit of fatuous mendacities including ersatz appellations. I did pretend I was hight A|E. Gatir, a fatuous pseudonym, pursuant to my anticipatory  pleasure regarding the eminent nonplussing of one, or both, of the managers atop our current position. Not only were the aforementioned parties addled by my esoteric jest, but you were also beset by befuddlement.
     Since my nom de guerre is A|E. Gatir, 'twould be contradictory to the possible to employ me as a substitute for Jeremy whilst I am already employed with the honorific title of Tableware Decontamination Engineer. Though, if you say I am "more qualified" I will bow to your unerring perception inasmuch as my wan powers of spelling fail me ceaselessly. Also, I do have a hirsute orb atop my neck. I hope my jape has not roiled anyone.


Sincerely,
Cornelius Jerusalem Storm

Soon to be
His Excellency, Grand Tyrant of America
Supreme Potentate of the Western World
Power Incarnate
Creator of Pestilence

oh yeah... Artwork...

Hmm i just thought seeing as everyone else is posting up drawings that i would aswell :) a couple old ones and a few new ones :P

Rose Tatoo thingy :P

Eyes i drew a while back...



GIR


GIR
GIR
GIR
Gir
Zim

Shinji Hirako..

This is Ichigo with a broken Hollow mask


This was my storefront for a shop-design project we had to do for Visual Communications


This is a Planometric Floor-plan of my shop
This is the inside view of my shop :)
This is a Logo that i did for a logo design project in Visual Communications



 This is a Computer and a Hallway with a cropped coloring that i did in Visual Communications


 This is another picture of ichigo



 This is picture of Deidara that i put into the art show



 Another of Deidara (Bad photography)
This is Full-Hollow Ichigo...


Random Play around in photoshop using new brush packs

CD cover project for visual communications. The light in the top left corner got screwed up when i changed the format of the image to hand it in to the teacher :S

Another photoshop play around...

An Important Date In History

So I was looking up stuff on the internet to see if anything interesting happened on the 28th of January and a remarkable amount of stuff came up.

1813- Pride and Predjudice first published

The words serendipity and Pakistan were first coined (invented) in 1754 and 1933 respectively.

1820- Antarctica was discovered!

1855- First locomotive to run from Atlantic to Pacific ocean via Panama Railway

1887- World's largest snowflakes reported- 15 inches wide and 8 inches thick

1896- First person to be convicted for speeding.

1915- Formation of the U.S coastguard

1958- Patent for Lego!!!!

1965- Current design of Canadian flag chosen

Birthday of King Henry VII, Nicolas Sarkozy (President of France) and Jackson Pollack

Deathday of Charlemagne and King Henry VIII

Isn't that interesting?

Thursday, 27 January 2011

I'd Just Like to Say...

You don't need that much equipment to draw my dear friends. You'll only need a regular old pencil, and an eraser to draw stuff like this:

That's how I managed that.                    ^
                                      
And with an art pencil, a regular old pencil, and an eraser you can draw stuff like this:

Again, how I managed.

For smudging you can just use your finger...But if you don't want to get them all dirty then use a smudge stick. *Giggles* His eye is a 'twee bit off...But um...For the eraser, just make sure that it is 'relatively' straight. Anyway...I love the step by step tutorial. The eye is slightly anime...I suck at anime eyes, by the way. *Shakes head ashamed* I beg pardon Ichigo...I didn't mean to screw up your eyes so bad. Actually, I suck at eyes in general. I can do EVERYTHING but the eyes.

Blessed be,
Miss Mary Hiashi

P.S. I really hope that didn't sound rude. I'm tired today and everyone has been telling me that I'm being rude...Or at least some people are.

How to draw a human eyeball

Hello everyone! Just for laughs, I made a tutorial on how to draw an eye, which is probably the only thing I know how to draw well. Here it is!

How to Draw an Eye

First, gather your materials.
 you will need...
A charcoal pencil that is medium soft (the one in the middle)
A white chalk pencil (the one to the right)
A hard pencil, I used a 5B (the one to the left)
Paper ( regular old, 8 1/2 by 11 works just fine)
A knife for sharpening the pencils and a container to catch the shavings
A mirror so you can look at your own eye for reference (I use a narrow one so i can look at just my eye)
Hairspray


Make sure you have all your stuff at a table or other hard surface that is comfortable to draw at ( I draw on a piece of cardboard as i'm sitting on my bed) Now on to drawing! 

Sharpen the medium pencil to a medium point (not too thin, not too fat, use your good judgment)



Draw a line. This will be the top of the eye.



Add the basic shape of an eye.



Add a triangle sort of shape at the corner and lightly add the line under the eye (too heavy on that line and it will look like your eye needs some sleep)



Smudge the corner and under the eye


 Lightly smudge the top of the eye and then add the round bit (I don't know what its called, lol)


Add the pupil and make sure it's nice and darkly colored


Color in the round part, then smudge. Make sure the pupil is nice and dark.



Blend the edges of the pupil with the round part


Darken the upper part of the eye (this will be the eyelid)



I use the word "smudge" a lot, don't I...


Add that little line thing, then lightly smudge


Soften up all the edges and define the corner of the eye a bit




Now is the time to make some little adjustments, use your judgment so it looks good to you.



Time to start the eyebrow! Draw a line that is roughly the same as the line in the first step.



Darken the line a bit, then smudge




Arch the eyebrow by adding another slightly curved line




Darken the brow by using short little strokes that look like hair, then smudge lightly



Shade all around and under the eye as lightly as you can.  I find that I have usually enough charcoal left on my fingers from all the shading that I really don't have to use the pencil.



Up to this point, I have been using that ^^^ pencil, which is a medium soft pencil, but now...



But now I switch to the 5B pencil, which is harder then the other pencil
  Now add some detail with the 5B pencil to the brow.


Now I switch to my white chalk pencil
With the white pencil I add a little highlight to the eye to make it pop



Add the finishing details. Lighten up what needs to be lightened, darken up what needs to be darkened, smudge what needs to be smudged, you get the idea...


Once everything is just the way you want it, take the hairspray and spray the paper with it so that it won't smudge. Try to hold the bottle of spray about a foot (30 centimeters) away from the paper and spray it in short bursts  (no pictures of this because i needed both hands)


A good way to tell if you sprayed the paper enough is if you hold it up to a bright light. If the eye is mostly covered then you're good. If the paper is dripping with hair spray then you put way too much on.



This is the final step! Once the hairspray is all dry then sign your masterpiece and date the work. I always like to put the date on my work so in a couple of months I can look back and say "Wow! That looks like crap! I'm so much better now!"


I hope this tutorial has not been too confusing and that it help you with your drawings. I'd love to see them if you post them so send me a link please.
Hey Hellboy, do you think you could get your brother to look at this? please?


Byeeeeeeeeeeeee Y'all!