Monday, 25 July 2011

Speakers Eat Children, I Swear!

Hi, hi! It's been a long time I know...I kind of, well, completely forgot that blogs existed until I searched something up and it took me to a blog site. I beg pardon. But...

I'll probably sound like a heartless wretch for saying this, but I've never cried over a pet. Never. I think because I had always accepted the fact far before the action occured. It didn't impede on the time that was lived, it just didn't impact sadly on the that which eventually died. I think too, that I always understood what death meant...I haven't lost any really close relatives but I know that I will eventually, that too is...okay. It will happen because life dictates that that is so. Que sera, sera. Whatever will be, will be.

I remember when I was five we had a rat named Charlie. He was a great little thing that loved people, and we loved him in turn. However, Charlie got cancer. I remember the red bump on his hind leg. One night before bed I went to the basement to say good night to my parents. They had Charlie in the box that he had always loved to play in (don't ask me why), they said it was to comfort him in his passing. They told me to say goodbye to him because that was the last time I would see him. So I said goodnight and that he was the best rat anyone could ever have had. We buried him in that same box beneath the tree behind our house.

When I was nine or so, our goat died. Her name was Daisy. It was during the winter and at night, she goat sick. The other goats cast her out and she ended up freezing to death. We buried her in the garden.

When I was ten, we put my horse down. She was a good old girl, but she was suffering terribly. I hugged her one last time and said my goodbyes before school and she was gone by the time I got home.

When I was twelve, the cat that we had had since before I was born was put down while I was away at school. I came home, and the air was different. I knew he was gone but I asked anyway. They said he wouldn't eat or drink. They took him to the vet to see what was wrong and they said that he was at the end of his road. I smiled at my mom and said "I can't believe that old man survived for this long. What with all those brawls he got into with both cats and dogs alike. And for having to put up with me as a baby."  She smiled back.

At some point after that, our goat died two days after its birth. It wouldn't eat or sleep. And some time after that our other cat died. I call him the winter kitty, because he was only there for winter before a car ran over him.

There's more but I should probably stop...I got a little carried away there. One word of wisdom though, never ask me to comfort you. I don't know how.

Anywho, I had some creamy chocolate rum cake not too long ago. It was D-E-L-I-C-I-O-U-S. Yes, good enough to emphasis by spelling. Also, Adam Lambert is an amazing singer, take this for example:

Then there is the most epica bad timing ever in a movie. (It's from the ending of Stephen King's the Mist. If you are planning on watching the movie and don't want any spoilers, don't watch this.)



But to lighten the mood...(WARNING: Some swearing!)

That is all...

Blessed be,
Miss Mary Hiashi

Monday, 11 July 2011

A Tale of Two Poems

Just a small creature
I found in the snow.
A little sweet cat
who needed a home.

With tenderness I carried you
out from the cruel cold,
and settled you here
in the warmth of my love.

What joy you brought me
You made me laugh.
The way you acted haughty
when you really wanted a cuddle.

You acted offended
when I picked you up.
But your purr gave you away
You silly sweet cat!

Trouble did not wait
To tear us apart.
Because of my allergy
to the garage you were cast out.

Guilt played upon my heart
Every time that I saw
You standing by the window
Waiting to be let in.

Puzzle you were,
of why this sudden change.
I wish I could have told you
That I loved you still.

I did what I could
to show you my love.
Even though I could no longer touch.
I fed you, kept you safe or so I thought.

Then one day you became ill
I didn’t know what to do.
Anxiousness filled me deep inside
as I saw you suffer in solitude.
 
I had to take you to the vet
Her news was hard to take.
She said there was no hope for you.
My heart right then did break.

Poor sweet kitty, so trusting
To me you came and rested,
While the doctor gave you
the final countdown of your life.

Peacefully you went to sleep.
But nevermore will you wake.
My tears fall down on your fur.
Wishing that I was not a murderer.

Into a blue blanket went your body.
Still so soft and so cuddly.
Into the ground you went in short after.
To be covered in dirt in my back yard.

I look around at the clear summer sky
Warm gentle breezes brush past my tears.
Yet happiness is far from me.
My soul cries out in agony.

Oh little lost critter I have betrayed you!
My heart will never forget,
this moment, this day, this hour.
Devistated, for I buried you today.

********************************************************************

This past week sucked major.
 It was one of the worst ever.
 I wished things could change
I wished I could make them better.

I had watched helplessly
as first one cat and then the other
were taken from me
before I knew what was happening. 

I turned to friends
and hid my guilt
that I was a traitor
to the ones I was to protect.

I read a few posts.
Some stopped my heart quick,
sending me reeling
into a bottomless pit.

Yet soon  I found strength.
Soon I found courage
to clime out of that pit
so that I could be with all of you.

I looked to the bright spots.
They carried me through.
Thalia's bravery, Mar's posts
Ann's kindness, and Hellboy's birthday.

There was plenty of reasons
to keep me from crying.
Celebrating you all
who come to the blogs.

Yet, forgive me please
if I just take a moment
to let go of my grief
though small it may seem.

My heart had been grieving for so long
before I met all in the SP gang.
Healing began when I met all of you.
Happiness blossomed as friendships bloomed.

Yet this blow that has struck me down
is not the first that left my heart bleeding.
If it does not stop I fear I should die.
Wasted away from all those times I cried.

A ray of light pierces my sadness.
Lifting up my eyes to all of your love.
Rising up I will come forth, 
take your hands and then rejoice.

Even in sadness
my heart will sing
with joy and laughter still!
For I have friends here
who I love and care for.
A gift from God that I treasure

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

The Wonderfulness That Is Bob Hale

Now I know that this show only airs in the UK (probably). But Horrible Histories is a brilliant show that makes history interesting! Well I've always found history fascinating but for those people who don't already love history this show makes history interesting. One of my favourite sketches are The Bob Hale Reports. So I've decided to gather all of them in one place to watch when I want to. I'll update it when new ones come out. And I apologise for the quality of 3 reports but they're the only ones on youtube so they'll have to do.

1. The Roman Report



2.  The Stone Age Report



3. The British Empire Report



4. The Viking Report



5. The Crusades Report



6. The Civil War Report



7. The Incan Report



8. The Protestant and Catholic Report



9. The French Revolution Report



10. The Pharoh Report



11. The War of the Roses Report



12. The American Report


13. The Anglo Saxon Report



Isn't he wonderful?

Sunday, 3 July 2011

Fliggen Hagen

...I pray thee Ashtoreth, please let that not mean anything. Especially not something offensive. That'd suck...

Anywho, Friday was a very interesting day. I apologized to at least five slugs, I did a lot of the grunt work for re-fencing the one area on my property, and I was out there for seven bloody hours! Yay Canada day. Damn posts. Well, now my shoulders are sore, and I have a killer headache from sunburn. It was around 27 degrees celsius. God it's hot! It is now somewhere around 21, which is a little bette,r but it is still really hot. The AC is on. *Sighs* I hate the summer.

I would not survive in places like Florida...Or Australia...Or...Well hot places. I like the fall. The temp. goes to about 13 degrees-ish. That's comfortable weather. *Sighs again*

But school's over with for now! Hu-freaking-zzuh!

I think that was the entirety of my rant...Now for this song:

(Blood Gulch Blues)

Blessed be,
Miss Mary Hiashi

Friday, 1 July 2011

The Duel

This is a post that recounts the epic duel  between Kallista Pendragon- The Beautiful Goddess Queen and Octaboona Ambrosius- Purple Poet and Paragon of the Horde of Iridescent Indigo, Glint of the Moon and Ember of the Glorious Sun.
A duel between Green and Purple.
Cast  of Characters:
Quinnera Elviana: 5th Seat of the Council of the Lost Ones  as Commentator.
Nicolette Croga - The Lone Wolf as Judge.
Octaboona Ambrosius- Purple Poet and Paragon of the Horde of Iridescent Indigo, Glint of the Moon and Ember of the Glorious Sun as Duelist representing the color Purple.
Kallista Pendragon- The Beautiful Goddess Queen as Duelist representing the color Green.
Lizzy the lovely un-dead vampire writer as Coach for Octaboona.
Legolas3 as Coach for Kallista.
Dragona Pine as the Marshmallow Bell Ringer!
Taia-DeMars as Vendor of over priced items.

********************************************************************************
AND SO WE BEGIN!

Quinn:
 Hello Blogland, and welcome to the wrestling match of the century. I'm Quinnera, I'm commentating today, and let me just say, it's going to be a great match! So, I’ll just introduce our crowd for today… First off we have, Dragona Pine- the marshmallow bell ringer! Second, we have Taia, our overpriced snack seller. Our judge today, is the amazing Nicolette Crook! In the crowd we have special guests Krane Farlin, Jackskin, Isabella Midnight and Florence Black!


Dragona:
Right.





Three





Two





One






FIGHT!









DING DING!



Quinn:
And finally… In this corner, she’s a lean mean fighting machine… She runs for the colour green! You may know her as the Beautiful, Goddess Queen, it’s the one, the only…. KALLISTA PENDRAGON with her amazing coach… Legolas!!!!

And in the other corner… He’s purple, and poetic… His rhymes are awesomely phonetic… Introducing the Paragon of the Purple Horde…. OCTABOONA AMBROSIUS with his awesomesauce coach… Lizzy!!!!

The bell has rung... we are awaiting the first move...

Taia:
*shouts* Hey, My snacks aren't overpriced!!

Octa:
*Kallista and I enter the ring*

Quinn:
*buys an overpriced snack from Taia*

Taia:
*offers Isabella some Lucozade* Only £6.55!!

Quinn:
The contestants have entered the ring... this is going to be an exciting match, folks...

Kalliata:
*struts around waving hands in the air to the cheering crowd, dressed in a short green sil komono, her hair done up in dreadlocks, a sparkly pink skull and crossbones on her lovely cheek*

Octa:
*is wearing flowing robes of deepest violet and beautiful lime green socks*
*rushes towards Kallista and gives her a royal noogie*  

Kalliata:
*dodges the noogie easily and fires of rapid rounds of bananas with her trusty banana gun*

 Quinn:
And Octa rushes in with a great move... but Kallista is looking absolutely fantastic... This is obviously anyone's game...

Legolas:
aim for the stars, kallista! If you miss, you'll land on a tree!!!!!!

Quinn:
Banana gun! Well. We weren't expecting that one... Nor were we expecting those lime green socks, nice touch Octa!

Octa:
*summons the ninja penguin army to defend him whilst he reaches for his marshmallow gun*

*the penguins approach Kallista with ninja speed, armed with long feathers*

TICKLE HER!!!


Legolas:
work that banana gun!!!

Octa:
*fires a rapid round of marshmallows at Kallista*


Kallista:
*turns and picks up Octa*

*spins him around a dozen times then ties him to the post with daisy chains*


*gives him a little kiss on the cheek*
So cute....

;P


REG


Quinn:
Ninja penguins... Interesting move... Except penguins feathers are so densely packed they would be useless for tickling... *recites the rest of her biology lesson* :P But the marshmallow gun could be useful...

Taia:
*walks up to Legolas grinning*
Refreshments?


Octa:
*struggles valiantly against the daisy chains, whilst the penguin army overcomes Kallista for the moment, as she lies laughing on the floor covered in marshmallows*

*yet Octa knows that Kallista will be back in the match in no time*

*snaps the daisy chains just in time as Kallista get to her feet*


Quinn:
Daisy chains and kisses? It seems like Kallista has a very different strategy to Octa... We'll have to wait and see which fails and which prevails!

Kallista:
*rolls a hedgehog at the penguines and they all fall over like bowling pins*


*reaches in her hair and pulls out a rainbow to dazzle him with, yet it pales beside her beauty*


*shrugging, she lassos him with it and twirls him around in it*

*with her other hand she shoots from her banana gun the coke attatchment*



*fizzy coke sprays Octa and all his minions*


REG


Quinn:
Octa has broken free of the daisy chains whilst Kallista is still struggling under the masses of daisy chains? Is this against the rules? *turns to rule book* The rule book says... There are no rules!

Lizzy:
*waves pom-poms around* YAY! No rules!

Quinn:
Kallista is trying a new technique of dazzle, wrap and spray! Time tested by the FBI (probably), this is sure to give him a run for his money!

Taia:
*waves CocaCola around*

Yay! Only £3.45, or £7.45 for 2!!


Nicolette:
*leans forward in her judging seat as the action heats up*

Dragona:
*sits on Quinn* *takes over the microphone*

This is the Marshmallow man, oooooooooooohhhh



*Quinn pushes Dragona off and continues with her speech* *sits on Lizzy instead and steals her pom poms*


Octa:
*gasps drenched in coke as he stares at the oncoming hedgehog army*

*thinks back to his rudimentary classes in hedgehogese*

Brave and Valiant Hedgehogs! I am not your enemy! Please I beseech you, leave me and my penguins in peace! And then tie me up in daisy chains... I mean HER up in daisy... ummm...

*looks in horror as hedgehogs advance with daisy chains*


Screams frantically! Tie me up! Me I say not her!

No... I mean..

Oh bother.


Kallista:
* rolls Octa over and sits on him while eating a jaffa cake*



*glares at all the penguines making them shiver in fear*

*sticks a couple bananas in his ears*




*steals his socks and hides them.....someplace secret*

>;P


Quinn:
*glares at Dragona* Now, it looks like Kallista has taken the lead with her amazing moves involving hedgehogs and daisy chains! Could this be a winner?

Octa:
*coomands penguins instead to defeat the hedgehogs*

*flips over and grabs the jaffa cake out of Kallista's hand*

*shoots the marshmallows at her*


Taia:
*realsies she is running out of snacks*

*grabs another box, filled with more snacks, and Kallista and Octa Wrestling Duel Action Figures*

*walks back into the crowd shouting out the high prices*


Octa:
*pulls out the bananas and feeds them to the hedgehogs as a peace offering*

*starts searching for his missing socks whilst holding off a hug from Kallista*


Quinn:
Octa's coming back in with the penguins and marshamallows... Could this be his comeback... or downfall?

Nicolette:
*taps her fingernails along the desk and leans back, casually takes a sip of her cola (which she didn't steal off Taia with her ninja skills and glances at the scoring cards*

Kallista:
*grins wickedly and EATS the marshmellows*




*belches, spraying Octa with pink and purple glitter theat smells like lavender roses*




*ties up all the panguains and dangles them from teh ceiling*


Taia:
Anyone want any souveniers??
Reasonable prices *cough* As If! *cough*


Quinn:
And Octa's signature penguins have been dangled from the ceiling! It looks like he'll have to bring something completely new to win this one.. Although he doesn't seem to have noticed... he's still looking for those socks... Good move with the peace offering though!

Octa:
*abandoned by his penguins, Octa gains strength from the purple glitter, and moves to his final resort*

*as purple petals swirl down around Kallista*

*starts to recite*

Her aura was of lavender
Its shine lit up the night
Kallista hair of silken gold
Out raced the birds in flight

*Kallista listens entranced as Octa approaches her and lifts her up into the air*


Legolas:
KALLISTA!! IT'S ALL ABOUT TEAMWORK! BETWEEN YOU AND UH...THE FLOOR! DON'T WACK THE FLOOR AND THE FLOOR WON'T RANDOMLY COLLAPSE! *watches floor collapse* NEVERMIND.

Quinn:
Now, Octa's brought out the big guns... Poetry... This might just win Kallista over... Only time will tell...


Now could be a good time to mention the stakes in this duel… Should Kallista win, Octa will have to post every single poem on his list of 40 on his blog, instead of 10… (please see this link: http://octaboonaambrosius.blogspot.com/2011/06/prizes-and-stuff.html). However, should Octa win, we will all have to write him a poem (or possibly short story/drawing/other work- I can’t remember the decision on that one…). As you can see we have a lot running on both teams. Who will win and who will lose? You'll just have to wait...


Kallista:
*manages to get past Octa's arms and ducks in for a hug*



*stays there for a moment enjoying it, then whirls him around and ties his hands behind his back with more daisy chains*



*drops a few rainbow granades around him and puts on anti rainbow glare sunglasses as granades explode, blinding him*


*takes her banana gun with the choco-thrower and sprays him with melted chocolate*


Quinn:
Kallista has managed to defeat Octa's move! Things are getting interesting, folks! Rainbow grenades, daisy chains and chocolate! Wow. Well. Let's see how Octa deals with this one...

Octa:
*even as he is tied up with daisy chains, hugged, grenades with rainbows, and sprayed with molten chocolate, Octa continues to stare at Kallista with adoration in his eyes*

*continues reciting Kallista's Feast*

*aims marshmallow gun*


*at the computer bank that stores the 40 poems*

I would destroy them!


Quinn:
Octa seems to be still trying his poetry technique... This could either work really well or really badly... But what's this? A marshmallow gun! :O *crowds goes oooooooh!*

Kallista:
* is temporaily dazed by the beauty of Octa's poem*




*then comes to her senses, (what little there is) And flips out of his arms*


*realises that was a dumb move as she LIKED being in his arms*



*leaps back into them, but trips him as she pushes him backwards*

*he lands on the soft petals and she begins to hypnotize him with her lovely singing voice into staying down*


Quinn:
*gets up and aims a gun containing Dodos at Octa* Don't. You. Dare. Destroy. Those. Poems.

*remembers her position as a commentator, and sits down dutifully, but keeps a firm eye on Octa*


Octa:
*whilst the audience gasps horror struck, Octa dashes towards Kallista, with the marshmallow gun set on molten sticky setting, as the ninja pengin leader zooms in on a snowmobile*

*fires the gun and Kallista is trapped against the ground by sticky molten marshmallows*


Nicolette:
*leans forward*

*silently preys for her penguins saftey*


Quinn:
Octa is down people! Is it over? Or does he have something left up his sleeve?

Octa:
*the roar of the snowmobile drowns out the hypnotic sound of Kallista's singing*

*Octa jumps up free from the spell*


Quinn:
And now it's Kallista who's down! It's anyone's game!

Octa:
*high fives the ninja penguin leader as he zooms away on the snowmobile*

Kalliata:
*shrieks wildly at her hedgehogs to eat the sticky molten marshmellows*


*manages to get one hand free*


*tosses a daisy chain granade*


*it explodes and covers Octa and his penguines in a huge net binding*


Legolas:
No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after eating one peanut!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU GOT THIS KALLISTA! SHOW 'EM WHAT IS REALLY INSIDE OF YOU!!!!!!!

Octa:
*bites through the daisy chains*

*inorder to speed up the process, he dips one of the bananas remaining in his ear into liquid nitrogen, and shatters the banana against the ground, now that it is sharp, begins sawing through the daisy chains with it*


Quinn:
And now Octa and his penguins are down in a massive daisy chain net... Folks, there hasn't been a daisy chain net that big since... *googles it* 1992! This is a once in a lifetime spectacle to see!

And Octa's trying to get through the daisy chains... Using his teeth?

No, wait, we have the help of a smashed banana, dipped in liquid nitrogen! Hurray for chemistry!



Dragona:
*climbs into the ring*


*stands between the two*



Draw, time expired. *waves hands madly*


Kallista:
*realises her marshmellow proof body armor is working and is able to get up*


*lassos all the penguins and Octa and drags him back*




*fires off rapid fire of bananas that covers him from head to toe, uses chocolate attachement to spray him with the meted treat*


*hegehogs knock him down and cover him as they begin to lick off the chocolate*


Octa:
*slouches nonchalantly as he waits for Kallista to fully escape from the molten marshamallow*

*realises the daisy chains prevent him from nonchalancy*

*continues to hack away with the nitrogenic bananna*




Quinn:
 An overruling on Dragona's claim by judge Nicolette... The match will continue! And with a stunning move by Kallista. That chocolate... pure genius...

Nicolette:
ohh well urm *stacks blank paper that she was meant to take notes on*

Well Octa your penguin army was fantastic ... but Kallista's Hedgehogs were that much cuter ...

as for tactics Kallista's singiung was great but Octa reciting poetry was better! ...

summing up all other things I have decided that ......



Octa:
*escapes from daisy chains only to be covered in an assortment of chocolate and hedgehogs*

Hey! We had a deal hedgehogs! I gave you bananas!

*uses willpower and telekenisis to separate hedgehogs from him one by one*


*Kallista and Octa look up, both of them pinned to the floor, one by hedgehogs and chocolate, the other still held down by a reinforcement of molten marshmallow*

*awaits Nicoletee's decision*


Nicolette:
I actually decided that the winner was Kallista!

I mean come on there hasn't been a daisy chain net that big since 1992!!!



Octa:
*runs up to Kallista and embraces her*

Well done. Congratulations. You are the better duelist of the two*


Quinn:
KALLISTA HAS WON!!!!!!! *cheers*

I must admit though, Octa put up a great fight, and it wouldn't be the same without him... so... Three cheers for Octa!

HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!

HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!

HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!


Octa:
And thus concludes the epic duel between Kallista and Octaboona, the pinnacle of blog wrestling, to be remembered until the end of eternity.


This concludes the epic duel between Octa and Kallista. 
It has been edited. To read the entire fight with all the  extra's, go to  http://dereklandy.blogspot.com/2011/06/end-of-world.html

Comments 2401 starting somewhere in the middle  through 2800.